Heart to heart to whom

This is actually an old blog which I missed. I promise I will try to catch up and put the Cuba trip and my new found anger on ASAP.

12th Feb 07

2 days before the most dreaded day of the year – Valentine’s day……. Painful… Simply because I am still single??? Having spent 25 Valentine’s days by myself it doesn’t really matter that much. To be frank, out of those 25, this is only the 6th of which I actually felt the desperation not to be alone. Either way, I know I will be by myself because I am away at Ipswich again this week. On the flip side, I can at least go for a swim, eat in my hotel room and don’t have to cook for myself in my bloody shed.

Buying the R isn’t one of the smartest things I have done in my life but as I said to my friends, ‘I need some colours in my life, my life is dull and the R makes me happy’. Driving it put a smile of my face, but also plenty of sweats as I am scared to damage the suspension, any bodywork, or the wheels. Might as well not drive it, what an idiot I am.

On Sunday, went to watch Arsenal at the Emirates. It was cool!!! I am not an Arsenal fan and I support the underdogs, in this case – Wigan. The stadium is very impressive and I would love to go again in the future. It is funny that if 1 row of people stand up, everyone else does, creating this vertical Mexican wave – I call it.

Originally, I asked Miss E to go. In fact, she said yes to it, just like other occasions and then backed out. This time, I didn’t give her a chance to back out, I asked her not to come. I asked her not to come based on the reason that she has to travel in a couple days and it was going to be cold and wet. What an irony that there wasn’t a single drop of rain for the entire evening. Until I was on my way back home from London. It was freezing, but it didn’t matter to me.

I am glad that I took my friend to the game because at least he knows football and appreciates the occasion. She said she wants to go… I am looking forward to my holiday so I might be able to meet someone special.

The reason for that is I believe in fate. Yes, I see many signs that tell me she is that person. But yet I am seeing even more warnings as the timing is completely out of sync. Just how many times I can take a person saying ‘maybe’, ‘not sure’, ‘sometimes’? Even if it is the nature of every single female out there I am refusing to be a typical man and accept it. If you don’t believe me, ask my mum. I don’t take shit from anyone. I am not a standby, if you don’t appreciate it, someone will. If it is a test of my patience then I am going to fail for sure. I understand relationship doesn’t fall on my lap. But, and big but it is, that there is only a limited number of ways to say I am not interested ‘F-off’.